Sleep and I have always had a rocky relationship. When my parents were going through their divorce I had chronic insomnia and nightmares, so my mom made me see a counselor. After that (most of which I can't remember), I slept well for a few years. I was always the first to fall asleep at sleepovers and didn't think anything of it. When I got older, though, sleeplessness crept in and has remained pretty constant for the last few years.
It's pretty bad now because:
1. I am a coffee fiend and can't go a day without it.
2. I haven't been exercising
3. I'm always stressed
4. I'm still wired from work most nights.
I hope when school starts I can break the cycle. God, it's frustrating! Isn't it funny how when you're little all you want to do is stay up late, and when you get older you just want more?
Whenever I go home, I end up sleeping most of the time. I don't know if the atmosphere is more comforting, or I just get bored and zonk out. But it's nice to catch up whenever I'm there.
I have to be at work in a mere eight hours, so I should try to get to sleep before then. I feel like my blog posts are a terrible bore to whomever bothers to read them. So I won't be offended if someone comes out and says, "It sucks." But it's mostly for my benefit anyway (:
Friday, December 31, 2010
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Faking It
When I'm a cashier at work I have to ask every customer if they have a rewards card. If not, I'm supposed to convince them to apply for one so that they can save ten percent. Whenever someone gets a card I get a credit and am able to choose a really exciting prize! ha. It's just strongly suggested everyone sell one on their shift.
I've convinced more people to apply lately because I've perfected the technique. I smile a lot and I say "How are y'all doin'?" if there are multiple people present. This ups my charm factor and makes the consumer more vulnerable.
Last night I contemplated my approach and thought about just how much I really fake stuff. Like every woman on earth, I've faked an orgasm. When I'm with my grandparents I play up my angel child role, the college girl who never parties. I fake enthusiasm when I'm in an inane conversation.
A more extreme example of faking it was Monday night, when I hung out with my friend Mike. I hadn't seen him in a long time, so when he suggested getting drunk and watching scary movies I was down. But when he asked me if I wanted to make out later that night, I said yes even though I didn't want to. I was bored and he was there. I'm just glad that the next day he clarified that we're just friends.
I'm just disgusted with myself sometimes. The number of guys I've had MEANINGFUL experience with...well there's just three. With everyone else, there was substances, revenge, convenience, or boredom in the picture. What's wrong with me?
My new year's resolution: to be more real, and true to myself (whomever that may be).
I've convinced more people to apply lately because I've perfected the technique. I smile a lot and I say "How are y'all doin'?" if there are multiple people present. This ups my charm factor and makes the consumer more vulnerable.
Last night I contemplated my approach and thought about just how much I really fake stuff. Like every woman on earth, I've faked an orgasm. When I'm with my grandparents I play up my angel child role, the college girl who never parties. I fake enthusiasm when I'm in an inane conversation.
A more extreme example of faking it was Monday night, when I hung out with my friend Mike. I hadn't seen him in a long time, so when he suggested getting drunk and watching scary movies I was down. But when he asked me if I wanted to make out later that night, I said yes even though I didn't want to. I was bored and he was there. I'm just glad that the next day he clarified that we're just friends.
I'm just disgusted with myself sometimes. The number of guys I've had MEANINGFUL experience with...well there's just three. With everyone else, there was substances, revenge, convenience, or boredom in the picture. What's wrong with me?
My new year's resolution: to be more real, and true to myself (whomever that may be).
Saturday, December 18, 2010
Pros and Cons
I'm still reeling from the Matt breakup; this past week has felt like a year. I'm grateful that friends have offered comfort and are willing to listen, but I don't want to overload them.
Everyday I second-guess my decision to end things with him. It seems sudden, though I now realize that my feelings haven't been the same for a while. I was caught up in the thrill of the chase three months ago. We'd party together and mess around afterwards, and I secretly loved not knowing what we were. It was after he asked me to be his girlfriend and we labeled everything that things went downhill. We spent every minute we weren't in class and I wasn't at work together. This was awesome for a while, but it got tiring. As heartless as this is, I was sick of him!
Monday I saw Matt briefly, then ran errands and went out to lunch with my friend Erin. I was talking about how Matt's slacker attitude bothered me when she abruptly said, "What really bothers me is how he treats you."
"Huh?"
"Yeah, he freaks out over even the littlest things. I've noticed you guys fighting a LOT. And it's not what you're arguing about, it's just his personality."
"Well I'm his first girlfriend. He doesn't really know how to treat girls yet."
"Malyssa, it's been months."
And then we talked about it for a good hour or so, which got me thinking. In my Journalism study session later that day, I made a Pro/Con list in my notebook. I don't have it with me at the moment, since I ran away to my mom's house for the weekend. But this is what I remember:
Pros:
-He's a good kisser
-He's good in bed (I taught him well, since he lost his V-card to me)
-He's sweet
-He's hot
-We have fun together
Cons:
-He's really immature
-He doesn't have a job
-He's a terrible student and doesn't even care. Copying my math homework when I'm the world's biggest dumbass when it comes to math=not a smart move
-His parents pay for everything so he's not accountable and doesn't seem to notice that he's a mooch
-He's needy. He ALWAYS wants to hang out, and I almost always indulge him even when I don't want to.
-He's argumentative
-I don't know if he even loves me, because I think he confuses a lot of the physical stuff for emotional stuff
-I don't know if I love him anymore
-He donates plasma and all of that money automatically goes to weed, alcohol and cigarettes. Which relates back to the fourth con.
I know we're in college and everyone dates different types of people. It's not like I'm looking for a husband or anything. The cons just outweighed the pros so much and as I re--read my list over and over again I realized: I have priorities, responsibilities, and goals. Matt doesn't.
Maybe this will change with time. I'm almost a year older than Matt and I know he has a lot of growing up to do. I learned from my first relationship that you can't change anyone, though. So I know I made the right decision in breaking up with him. It still breaks my heart. He didn't see it coming, and he's such a good guy--but for someone else. I feel awful when I think of how he said he saw us going out until at least next summer, and how we planned to spend New Year's Eve together. There's always the musings of what could have been.
"It's tearing up my heart when I'm with you
But when we are apart I feel it too
And no matter what I do I feel the pain
With or without you"
--Nsync, baby. A band that weirdly enough, Matt saw and I never did (his sister wanted to go and his mom made the whole family come along).
Everything still reminds me of him, obviously. But it will pass...
Everyday I second-guess my decision to end things with him. It seems sudden, though I now realize that my feelings haven't been the same for a while. I was caught up in the thrill of the chase three months ago. We'd party together and mess around afterwards, and I secretly loved not knowing what we were. It was after he asked me to be his girlfriend and we labeled everything that things went downhill. We spent every minute we weren't in class and I wasn't at work together. This was awesome for a while, but it got tiring. As heartless as this is, I was sick of him!
Monday I saw Matt briefly, then ran errands and went out to lunch with my friend Erin. I was talking about how Matt's slacker attitude bothered me when she abruptly said, "What really bothers me is how he treats you."
"Huh?"
"Yeah, he freaks out over even the littlest things. I've noticed you guys fighting a LOT. And it's not what you're arguing about, it's just his personality."
"Well I'm his first girlfriend. He doesn't really know how to treat girls yet."
"Malyssa, it's been months."
And then we talked about it for a good hour or so, which got me thinking. In my Journalism study session later that day, I made a Pro/Con list in my notebook. I don't have it with me at the moment, since I ran away to my mom's house for the weekend. But this is what I remember:
Pros:
-He's a good kisser
-He's good in bed (I taught him well, since he lost his V-card to me)
-He's sweet
-He's hot
-We have fun together
Cons:
-He's really immature
-He doesn't have a job
-He's a terrible student and doesn't even care. Copying my math homework when I'm the world's biggest dumbass when it comes to math=not a smart move
-His parents pay for everything so he's not accountable and doesn't seem to notice that he's a mooch
-He's needy. He ALWAYS wants to hang out, and I almost always indulge him even when I don't want to.
-He's argumentative
-I don't know if he even loves me, because I think he confuses a lot of the physical stuff for emotional stuff
-I don't know if I love him anymore
-He donates plasma and all of that money automatically goes to weed, alcohol and cigarettes. Which relates back to the fourth con.
I know we're in college and everyone dates different types of people. It's not like I'm looking for a husband or anything. The cons just outweighed the pros so much and as I re--read my list over and over again I realized: I have priorities, responsibilities, and goals. Matt doesn't.
Maybe this will change with time. I'm almost a year older than Matt and I know he has a lot of growing up to do. I learned from my first relationship that you can't change anyone, though. So I know I made the right decision in breaking up with him. It still breaks my heart. He didn't see it coming, and he's such a good guy--but for someone else. I feel awful when I think of how he said he saw us going out until at least next summer, and how we planned to spend New Year's Eve together. There's always the musings of what could have been.
"It's tearing up my heart when I'm with you
But when we are apart I feel it too
And no matter what I do I feel the pain
With or without you"
--Nsync, baby. A band that weirdly enough, Matt saw and I never did (his sister wanted to go and his mom made the whole family come along).
Everything still reminds me of him, obviously. But it will pass...
Wednesday, December 15, 2010
E...S...J...M...fuck that. It's time for me.
What's the deal with my brain?
Why am I so obviously insane?
In a perfect situation
I let love down the drain
Oh, Weezer. I'm a mess, honestly. And this isn't about Matt in particular. I'm just coming to this realization that I've thrived on relationships too much. This is my third breakup of 2010. For the last four years I've consistently been in some kind of relationship. And that's messed up. I need to take time to find myself, as cliche as that is.
"Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same"--The Fray
"There comes a time when we must choose between what is right and what is easy"--Dumbledore
Why am I so obviously insane?
In a perfect situation
I let love down the drain
Oh, Weezer. I'm a mess, honestly. And this isn't about Matt in particular. I'm just coming to this realization that I've thrived on relationships too much. This is my third breakup of 2010. For the last four years I've consistently been in some kind of relationship. And that's messed up. I need to take time to find myself, as cliche as that is.
"Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same"--The Fray
"There comes a time when we must choose between what is right and what is easy"--Dumbledore
Tuesday, December 7, 2010
BOB Ron Weasley
Mackenzie, this was a baller topic choice. Just so ya know. And this blog post is all over the place, just to give y'all a warning.
I love Ron. He's adorable and I think it's funny how he's in love with Hermione the whole time and badly hides it. Unlike a lot of girls, though, I don't find him attractive. Something about gingers just makes me go: Nahhhh. They're so not my type. Not to be racist, or anything.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7FwXPz8Slc
The only gingers I'll make an exception for are Fred and George...hot damn. I'd take them. Well, maybe just one. Two guys would be really overwhelming.
Though gingers get a lot of shit, I can think of some power redheads. The Weasleys are all pretty bad-ass. Hayley Williams of Paramore, Sean Astin (Truffle Shuffle/Samwise Gangee), Lucille Ball, Amy Adams, Lindsay Lohan when she was still cool. The artist Titian painted chicks with red hair a lot; he was kinda obsessed.
I think Rupert Grint was the PERFECT choice for Ron in the movies; actually the whole Weasley family was cast well. I was unsure about Daniel and Emma at first until they grew on me (especially Daniel, who is still my #1 celeb crush). Grint exemplifies Ron's personality beautifully and is endearingly awkward. He's a talented actor who I'm sure will have great success outside the Harry Potter films (check out Driving Lessons, another good movie with him in it).
To conclude: Gingers still don't have souls.
I love Ron. He's adorable and I think it's funny how he's in love with Hermione the whole time and badly hides it. Unlike a lot of girls, though, I don't find him attractive. Something about gingers just makes me go: Nahhhh. They're so not my type. Not to be racist, or anything.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7FwXPz8Slc
The only gingers I'll make an exception for are Fred and George...hot damn. I'd take them. Well, maybe just one. Two guys would be really overwhelming.
Though gingers get a lot of shit, I can think of some power redheads. The Weasleys are all pretty bad-ass. Hayley Williams of Paramore, Sean Astin (Truffle Shuffle/Samwise Gangee), Lucille Ball, Amy Adams, Lindsay Lohan when she was still cool. The artist Titian painted chicks with red hair a lot; he was kinda obsessed.
I think Rupert Grint was the PERFECT choice for Ron in the movies; actually the whole Weasley family was cast well. I was unsure about Daniel and Emma at first until they grew on me (especially Daniel, who is still my #1 celeb crush). Grint exemplifies Ron's personality beautifully and is endearingly awkward. He's a talented actor who I'm sure will have great success outside the Harry Potter films (check out Driving Lessons, another good movie with him in it).
To conclude: Gingers still don't have souls.
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
BOB Challenge Numero Cinco: Thanksgiving
I currently work in retail and have really noticed how much Christmas overshadows Thanksgiving. We have one table of tacky discounted ceramic turkeys near the back of the store. The rest of the store is already festooned with Christmas decorations and we're wearing holiday buttons on our name tags. They read "Merry Christmas! Feliz Navidad! Happy Hanukkah! Happy Kwanzah!" Something for everyone. Like there's any Jewish people in Logan...
Even though it's overshadowed, Thanksgiving is an awesome holiday. The root cause of it is kinda sketchy, since I guess it led to white people taking land from the Native Americans. Today ,though, we can ignore that and consume mass amounts of food. This is something I don't need a holiday to accomplish, but it certainly justifies it. And mass amounts of food are always available at my grandma's house. Not only do we have the traditional turkey, people always bring enchiladas, pasole, and other delicious Mexican food. My grandma lives in a tiny house in the ghetto. It's always cramped and only has one bathroom. Yet every year we gather there because she says we have to, and everyone is a little afraid of this woman. I know I am. When she tells me to help her, I hop on it.
That's also why my family always eats at her house, even though we're supposed to switch off every year and have some Thanksgivings at my stepdad's parents' house. Every year he's like "Aren't we supposed to eat at mom and dad's?" and my mother will reply with, "John is visiting this year!", or "Weren't we there last year?" Eventually he gives up and goes back to sulking in his garage like usual. I don't really feel bad because my grandparents like doing there own thing, and we spend every Christmas Eve with them no matter what. Sadly, I may have to work on Christmas Eve and be stuck in Logan until 6:00 that night...which will thrill my mom. But I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.
I am so so stoked for Thanksgiving this year, more so than usual. I need this break and I haven't seen my family in over two months thanks to my crazy schedule. Thank God for Sierra and Jansen for covering my Saturday and Sunday shifts (they wanted more hours, and I gave them to them). And for Haylee for giving me a ride shortly. I'm also stoked to see friends that I've been separated from. And my adorable little puppies, who I'm sure are obese now because I'm the only one who walks them and doesn't overfeed them. I will on Thanksgiving though. Because who doesn't need the combination of lots of food and exercise then?
Even though it's overshadowed, Thanksgiving is an awesome holiday. The root cause of it is kinda sketchy, since I guess it led to white people taking land from the Native Americans. Today ,though, we can ignore that and consume mass amounts of food. This is something I don't need a holiday to accomplish, but it certainly justifies it. And mass amounts of food are always available at my grandma's house. Not only do we have the traditional turkey, people always bring enchiladas, pasole, and other delicious Mexican food. My grandma lives in a tiny house in the ghetto. It's always cramped and only has one bathroom. Yet every year we gather there because she says we have to, and everyone is a little afraid of this woman. I know I am. When she tells me to help her, I hop on it.
That's also why my family always eats at her house, even though we're supposed to switch off every year and have some Thanksgivings at my stepdad's parents' house. Every year he's like "Aren't we supposed to eat at mom and dad's?" and my mother will reply with, "John is visiting this year!", or "Weren't we there last year?" Eventually he gives up and goes back to sulking in his garage like usual. I don't really feel bad because my grandparents like doing there own thing, and we spend every Christmas Eve with them no matter what. Sadly, I may have to work on Christmas Eve and be stuck in Logan until 6:00 that night...which will thrill my mom. But I'll cross that bridge when I come to it.
I am so so stoked for Thanksgiving this year, more so than usual. I need this break and I haven't seen my family in over two months thanks to my crazy schedule. Thank God for Sierra and Jansen for covering my Saturday and Sunday shifts (they wanted more hours, and I gave them to them). And for Haylee for giving me a ride shortly. I'm also stoked to see friends that I've been separated from. And my adorable little puppies, who I'm sure are obese now because I'm the only one who walks them and doesn't overfeed them. I will on Thanksgiving though. Because who doesn't need the combination of lots of food and exercise then?
Thursday, November 18, 2010
Lazy Thursday
Shannon tagged me in this on Facebook, but I didn't want to put it on there. So here it is, a fun useless survey
Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 50 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.
1. I usually don't do really long notes like this. I'm just bored. Hmmm.
2. For once I did my reading responses for my modern rhetorical theory class early. I'm really pleased with myself haha
3. I work at T. J. Maxx. Most of the people are pretty chill and it's fun when I"m not dealing with an irritated customer.
4. Dr. Pepper is my favorite soda, but when I was a freshman Michelle Beaudoin told us on the soccer bus that it makes your vag stink. I didn't really remember or believe her until I got it at Del Taco once and this guy Connor told us that it's true. His ex Taylor used to drink it all the time and...well you get the idea
5. My dream is to be a book editor at a publishing company in New York City. I definitely have a long way to go to reach it.
6. I really like stupid shows like Jersey Shore. They're just a hilarious escape and it's easy to make fun of everyone on them.
7. Concerts are the best, but I haven't been to one since summer. Work and school keep me pretty tied up, and school drains most of my money.
8. I move around a lot in my sleep. And I talk/moan. I feel bad for everyone who's ever shared a bed with me, but only some of them have complained.
9. I'm only on numbe nine. Goddammit.
10. I'm listening to Sublime. Looooove them.
11. Two weeks ago Matt and I played beer pong and I actually did really well. I sank most of our cups.
12. That doesn't happen a lot. Usually I'm the weaker partner.
13. I recently rented Love Actually for our weekly (well, we try to do it weekly) Girl's Night. I really liked it, except for the few loose ends left for some of the couples.
14. I eat a LOT. It's a wonder I'm not obese.
15. I really need to go to the grocery store.
16. And do my laundry.
17. But I'm filling this out instead.
18. Most days I roll out of bed and go to class in my sweats, then shower after. Everyone I go to school with who doesn't know me probably thinks I'm homeless.
19. I had acrylic nails for a while but they were too much hassle. I like just nail polish more. So does Matt.
20. Matt is my boyfriend, by the way. We've been officially together for a little over a month (:
21. He's my third boyfriend. I'm his first girlfriend.
22. I miss my family. The ones in Utah, Texas, everywhere. I don't see them often enough.
23. When I was little I couldn't say "c" or "k" sounds and had to go to speech therapy.
24. I was raised Catholic and went to Catholic school from 4th to 12th grade. I've been a non-believer for about four years though.
25. Dogs are better than cats, in my opinion
26. I'm uncomfortable with silence, and always awkwardly talk about nothing when things get quiet.
27. I'm actually always awkward. It's sad.
28. I have a tattoo of a Leo sign on my lower left back. There are three stars on it, for my three best friends.
29. I want another tattoo, I just don't know what or where.
30. I am a slob and can live in filth for days at a time. Eventually though I have to make my bed and everything just because our place is small and I don't want to take it over.
31. Heather and Erin sleep at our apartment almost every night. So usually there's six of us in 219. Matt and Alex sleep here often too.
32. I have a pretty goddamn dirty mouth.
33. That's a quote from a movie, but it's true.
34. I've kissed three girls. Twice I was drunk and dared to do it. The third time a friend was high and went for it, and I just didn't know what to do. I'm straight though and plan not to have that experience again haha
35. I'm a nude model for figure drawing classes and sketch groups. I'm so used to it that I'm not even fazed being naked in front of strangers.
36. I like to think that's a good thing, because it's helped my confidence.
37. I really want to travel. If I can I want to take a year off after college and just go everywhere.
38. My name is unusual and that's why I love it. I don't want to change it, ever.
39. I have a boy sense of humor and am often really blunt and gross.
40. Recently Erin and Katie had me list any guy friends I have who I HAVEN'T hooked up with or dated, aren't in relationships, and with whom I still hang out with a lot. I could only come up with four. I felt like a loser whore.
41. I'm really bad at keeping in touch with people. It doesn't mean I love them any less, I'm just self-absorbed.
42. My scents are Marc Jacob Daisy and Pink fresh and clean. And all of those Gwen Stefani harajuku perfumes. I'm obsessed.
43. My mom is my role model. She's the strongest person I know.
44. My dad and I are buddies. We watch South Park and go to concerts together.
45. When I was little I secretly wanted to be a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader. They were the shit.
46. I love nature. Hikes and walks and stuff like that help me disconnect from my hectic life.
47. I have no regrets. All the mistakes I've made have helped me to become me. Which is such a cliche, but true.
48. Betos is my favorite fast food. Drunk, high, sober, I'll devour it like a boss.
49. I enjoy a lot of things that are bad for me, like smoking and beer pong. I just figure that I'm young and crazy, and I might as well just LIVE (:
50. I'm done! mwahahaha
Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 50 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.
1. I usually don't do really long notes like this. I'm just bored. Hmmm.
2. For once I did my reading responses for my modern rhetorical theory class early. I'm really pleased with myself haha
3. I work at T. J. Maxx. Most of the people are pretty chill and it's fun when I"m not dealing with an irritated customer.
4. Dr. Pepper is my favorite soda, but when I was a freshman Michelle Beaudoin told us on the soccer bus that it makes your vag stink. I didn't really remember or believe her until I got it at Del Taco once and this guy Connor told us that it's true. His ex Taylor used to drink it all the time and...well you get the idea
5. My dream is to be a book editor at a publishing company in New York City. I definitely have a long way to go to reach it.
6. I really like stupid shows like Jersey Shore. They're just a hilarious escape and it's easy to make fun of everyone on them.
7. Concerts are the best, but I haven't been to one since summer. Work and school keep me pretty tied up, and school drains most of my money.
8. I move around a lot in my sleep. And I talk/moan. I feel bad for everyone who's ever shared a bed with me, but only some of them have complained.
9. I'm only on numbe nine. Goddammit.
10. I'm listening to Sublime. Looooove them.
11. Two weeks ago Matt and I played beer pong and I actually did really well. I sank most of our cups.
12. That doesn't happen a lot. Usually I'm the weaker partner.
13. I recently rented Love Actually for our weekly (well, we try to do it weekly) Girl's Night. I really liked it, except for the few loose ends left for some of the couples.
14. I eat a LOT. It's a wonder I'm not obese.
15. I really need to go to the grocery store.
16. And do my laundry.
17. But I'm filling this out instead.
18. Most days I roll out of bed and go to class in my sweats, then shower after. Everyone I go to school with who doesn't know me probably thinks I'm homeless.
19. I had acrylic nails for a while but they were too much hassle. I like just nail polish more. So does Matt.
20. Matt is my boyfriend, by the way. We've been officially together for a little over a month (:
21. He's my third boyfriend. I'm his first girlfriend.
22. I miss my family. The ones in Utah, Texas, everywhere. I don't see them often enough.
23. When I was little I couldn't say "c" or "k" sounds and had to go to speech therapy.
24. I was raised Catholic and went to Catholic school from 4th to 12th grade. I've been a non-believer for about four years though.
25. Dogs are better than cats, in my opinion
26. I'm uncomfortable with silence, and always awkwardly talk about nothing when things get quiet.
27. I'm actually always awkward. It's sad.
28. I have a tattoo of a Leo sign on my lower left back. There are three stars on it, for my three best friends.
29. I want another tattoo, I just don't know what or where.
30. I am a slob and can live in filth for days at a time. Eventually though I have to make my bed and everything just because our place is small and I don't want to take it over.
31. Heather and Erin sleep at our apartment almost every night. So usually there's six of us in 219. Matt and Alex sleep here often too.
32. I have a pretty goddamn dirty mouth.
33. That's a quote from a movie, but it's true.
34. I've kissed three girls. Twice I was drunk and dared to do it. The third time a friend was high and went for it, and I just didn't know what to do. I'm straight though and plan not to have that experience again haha
35. I'm a nude model for figure drawing classes and sketch groups. I'm so used to it that I'm not even fazed being naked in front of strangers.
36. I like to think that's a good thing, because it's helped my confidence.
37. I really want to travel. If I can I want to take a year off after college and just go everywhere.
38. My name is unusual and that's why I love it. I don't want to change it, ever.
39. I have a boy sense of humor and am often really blunt and gross.
40. Recently Erin and Katie had me list any guy friends I have who I HAVEN'T hooked up with or dated, aren't in relationships, and with whom I still hang out with a lot. I could only come up with four. I felt like a loser whore.
41. I'm really bad at keeping in touch with people. It doesn't mean I love them any less, I'm just self-absorbed.
42. My scents are Marc Jacob Daisy and Pink fresh and clean. And all of those Gwen Stefani harajuku perfumes. I'm obsessed.
43. My mom is my role model. She's the strongest person I know.
44. My dad and I are buddies. We watch South Park and go to concerts together.
45. When I was little I secretly wanted to be a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader. They were the shit.
46. I love nature. Hikes and walks and stuff like that help me disconnect from my hectic life.
47. I have no regrets. All the mistakes I've made have helped me to become me. Which is such a cliche, but true.
48. Betos is my favorite fast food. Drunk, high, sober, I'll devour it like a boss.
49. I enjoy a lot of things that are bad for me, like smoking and beer pong. I just figure that I'm young and crazy, and I might as well just LIVE (:
50. I'm done! mwahahaha
Thursday, November 11, 2010
BOB Challenge Numbah 4
Like Shannon, I was really ignorant in this last election. I follow national politics pretty well and voted in the 2008 presidential election. But this school year I've been really lazy and haven't paid as much attention. I know what I want in a candidate and I identify as a Democrat. Though I'm taking 16 credits and have two jobs, there really is no excuse. How much time do I waste messing around on Facebook, watching America's Next Top Model, and reading the chick lit books my roommate recently brought from home? A lot.
So sadly, I don't have much to contribute to this blog post. Carmen was smart in choosing it, because she'll sound really intelligent compared to me. ha
Carmen is really intelligent though, and a better American than I am.
So that's the end of my blog post...
So sadly, I don't have much to contribute to this blog post. Carmen was smart in choosing it, because she'll sound really intelligent compared to me. ha
Carmen is really intelligent though, and a better American than I am.
So that's the end of my blog post...
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
BOB Challenge Numbah 3: The Universe
I applaud Mack for choosing this awesome topic. I'm fascinated by stars, planets and the possibility of alien life forms. Astrology definitely has meaning in my life. I have a tattoo of a Leo sign with three stars that stand for my three best friends. When I was younger I thought I wasn't meant to be a Leo because I was so shy. Carmen and I used to joke that we should trade birthdays, because she was more like a Leo and I was more like a Virgo. Now I feel that I've embraced my sign. I'm definitely more outgoing and confident, if still awkward.
I think that there's life beyond earth. I don't have any scientific theories on the subject, but it's a strong feeling I have. Humans are really selfish and oblivious for the most part. Last night I got high with some friends and watched the sequel to 30 Days of Night, a vampire movie. At the beginning a woman leading a meaning says something like, "There are vampires among us, and I'm going to turn on this super bright light to prove it to you." Everyone laughs, but when she does it several people die because they are vampires. The undead were walking among them and nobody even noticed.
I've also heard a lot about the possibility of a multiverse. If this exists, that would mean that there is an alternative universe for every single action of our lives and all of these layers combine to make our multiverse. For example, there could be a universe in which I wore a black shirt today instead of a gray one. Since this depends on so many tiny individual factors, it's too vast to contemplate but certainly plausible. Think of Back To The Future, when Marty McFly has to make sure that his parents meet so that he can exist. There are so many possible consequences.
The more I think about it, the more it trips me out. Are we real? Am I just a figment of some weirdo's imagination? I can see that. "I'm going to dream up an incredibly awkward chick and send her to college so that she can screw up over and over, become a nude model, and eat enough Beto's burritos to feed an impoverished nation."
The universe often comes up in conversations when my friends and I are drunk/high/cross-faded. Most of us agree that "something is out there, maaaaaan." Then again, none of us are that brilliant under the influence. I remember we had an awesome plan in which we'd get all the world's leaders to smoke weed together. Then there would be no more war. I still hold to that one as being sort of true, I guess.
Overall, the universe is really big and makes my head hurt. I'm going to go to Beto's.
I think that there's life beyond earth. I don't have any scientific theories on the subject, but it's a strong feeling I have. Humans are really selfish and oblivious for the most part. Last night I got high with some friends and watched the sequel to 30 Days of Night, a vampire movie. At the beginning a woman leading a meaning says something like, "There are vampires among us, and I'm going to turn on this super bright light to prove it to you." Everyone laughs, but when she does it several people die because they are vampires. The undead were walking among them and nobody even noticed.
I've also heard a lot about the possibility of a multiverse. If this exists, that would mean that there is an alternative universe for every single action of our lives and all of these layers combine to make our multiverse. For example, there could be a universe in which I wore a black shirt today instead of a gray one. Since this depends on so many tiny individual factors, it's too vast to contemplate but certainly plausible. Think of Back To The Future, when Marty McFly has to make sure that his parents meet so that he can exist. There are so many possible consequences.
The more I think about it, the more it trips me out. Are we real? Am I just a figment of some weirdo's imagination? I can see that. "I'm going to dream up an incredibly awkward chick and send her to college so that she can screw up over and over, become a nude model, and eat enough Beto's burritos to feed an impoverished nation."
The universe often comes up in conversations when my friends and I are drunk/high/cross-faded. Most of us agree that "something is out there, maaaaaan." Then again, none of us are that brilliant under the influence. I remember we had an awesome plan in which we'd get all the world's leaders to smoke weed together. Then there would be no more war. I still hold to that one as being sort of true, I guess.
Overall, the universe is really big and makes my head hurt. I'm going to go to Beto's.
Thursday, October 21, 2010
League of BOB Challenge #2: Regrets
I'm with Shannon on this one for the most part. Make no mistake, I have fucked up a LOT. Yet I have to fall back on that old cliche: my mistakes have made me who I am.
I mentioned in a past post that I chose Utah State because my boyfriend at the time was going here. That was a stupid choice, but it's led to awesome things. I love my classes, my friends and my jobs up here. I couldn't ask for a better college life, something I wouldn't have assumed of Utah State had I casually been perusing schools as a high school senior.
I've failed to take responsibility for myself a lot in the past. When I was in high school I wasn't concerned with getting a real job or learning to drive because I just didn't give a fuck. I was self-absorbed and wrapped up in petty things (a lot of them to do with my ex). I feel like I've grown up a lot in the last year and a half. Though I should have been more of an adult back then, fucking around helped me realize what an idiot I was and made me work twice as hard later.
I'm sure when I'm older I'll regret some aspects of my current lifestyle. Smoking, drinking and sleeping around (not now that I'm with Matt) don't do the body good. But the last time I was cross-faded, I had a vision. I was an old lady whose mind was totally fucked up, not unlike Tommy Chong's character in That '70s Show. Though I wasn't all there, I was incredibly happy. I had led a full life. That's what it's all about (:
"There's only us/There's only this/Forget regret/Or life is yours to miss..."--That goddamn musical that everyone at ho's (myself included) was obsessed with freshman year.
It's so true though. I'm 20 years old. Gonna live it up yo! :D
I mentioned in a past post that I chose Utah State because my boyfriend at the time was going here. That was a stupid choice, but it's led to awesome things. I love my classes, my friends and my jobs up here. I couldn't ask for a better college life, something I wouldn't have assumed of Utah State had I casually been perusing schools as a high school senior.
I've failed to take responsibility for myself a lot in the past. When I was in high school I wasn't concerned with getting a real job or learning to drive because I just didn't give a fuck. I was self-absorbed and wrapped up in petty things (a lot of them to do with my ex). I feel like I've grown up a lot in the last year and a half. Though I should have been more of an adult back then, fucking around helped me realize what an idiot I was and made me work twice as hard later.
I'm sure when I'm older I'll regret some aspects of my current lifestyle. Smoking, drinking and sleeping around (not now that I'm with Matt) don't do the body good. But the last time I was cross-faded, I had a vision. I was an old lady whose mind was totally fucked up, not unlike Tommy Chong's character in That '70s Show. Though I wasn't all there, I was incredibly happy. I had led a full life. That's what it's all about (:
"There's only us/There's only this/Forget regret/Or life is yours to miss..."--That goddamn musical that everyone at ho's (myself included) was obsessed with freshman year.
It's so true though. I'm 20 years old. Gonna live it up yo! :D
Saturday, October 16, 2010
League of BOB Challenge #1: The Halloween Spirit
I know this post is two days late, and I apologize to the other members of BOB. Rest assured it's not because I'm lazy, but busy. Well, maybe a little lazy ;)
Halloween! I'm so stoked. The weather here is awesome and I hope that the globe continues to warm so that I can wear my skimpy Esmeralda from The Hunchback of Notre Dame costume without a coat. I don't know what my plans for Halloween are yet. I may have to work, but I'll be off by 10 if so and that's when all the good parties start (or later).
Last year I noticed a lot more Halloween spirit around USU than there is now. As of now I still don't know the theme for The Howl or who's throwing parties. I did go to a haunted hollow and corn maze with some friends last night, which was fun. We pregamed for these festivities and had a sleepover at my place after.
When I was little, Halloween was the shiznit. It topped Christmas in my book because I loved dressing up (and still do). If there were a holiday where one could dress up AND receive gifts, then I'd be set for life. Actually, that would be my birthday because most years I've worn a tiara, or at least a cute new shirt or something.
I think most young people go hard or go home when this magical holiday rolls around. You're either sitting home watching scary movies and handing out candy, or crossfaded and throwing up on your One Night Stand costume (true story, it happened to a friend). Though I'm not sure of my plans yet, I will most definitely be going hard. I'm twenty years old and I want to party hardy while I'm still young and stupid enough to do so.
Happy Halloween!!!! (:
Halloween! I'm so stoked. The weather here is awesome and I hope that the globe continues to warm so that I can wear my skimpy Esmeralda from The Hunchback of Notre Dame costume without a coat. I don't know what my plans for Halloween are yet. I may have to work, but I'll be off by 10 if so and that's when all the good parties start (or later).
Last year I noticed a lot more Halloween spirit around USU than there is now. As of now I still don't know the theme for The Howl or who's throwing parties. I did go to a haunted hollow and corn maze with some friends last night, which was fun. We pregamed for these festivities and had a sleepover at my place after.
When I was little, Halloween was the shiznit. It topped Christmas in my book because I loved dressing up (and still do). If there were a holiday where one could dress up AND receive gifts, then I'd be set for life. Actually, that would be my birthday because most years I've worn a tiara, or at least a cute new shirt or something.
I think most young people go hard or go home when this magical holiday rolls around. You're either sitting home watching scary movies and handing out candy, or crossfaded and throwing up on your One Night Stand costume (true story, it happened to a friend). Though I'm not sure of my plans yet, I will most definitely be going hard. I'm twenty years old and I want to party hardy while I'm still young and stupid enough to do so.
Happy Halloween!!!! (:
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Life is Beautiful
So I haven't posted in a while, but I'm stoked for the B.O.B thing. When does that start, anyway?
In the meantime, I'm just really happy and want to write about it.
Reasons Why I am Stoked:
1. I got another job! I applied at T.J. Maxx about three weeks ago, interviewed last week, and got the job this week. I start in the fitting room on Monday. One of my roommates works there so it'll be way fun and convenient. The girl I did orientation with today lives by me so now I know two fellow employees (other than management and all) before I've even started. Wheeeeeeeeeeeee
2. Weekends here are amazing. Friday night is always a party, somewhere, sometimes combined with a game. Though one two weeks ago ended with us running from the cops, I have a bad ass scrape and no M.I.P. ticket to show for it because I ran so damn fast. And I hid in a window ditch for an hour,. Pure adrenaline there. We also go camping in the canyon every Saturday night, which is always a blast. There's no worrying about cops, it's a beautiful area and the funniest shit goes down.
3. I'm kind of seeing someone. He's awesome and I don't know what we are or where we're going. But it's fun. I'm just going to enjoy it and see what happens. :)
4. Jersey Shore, America's Next Top Model and Glee. 'Nuff said.
5. Classes are going well. I slack off but manage to stay on top of them, which sounds weird. I mean that I can skip journalism often but still ace the test. Pure luck? Maybe. I still work though, and I balance stuff well.
6. My new belly button rings. The one I'm wearing now is a Rasta colored peace sign
7. My awesome friends and family. I'm truly blessed. For reals.
Loving life, all in all! (:
In the meantime, I'm just really happy and want to write about it.
Reasons Why I am Stoked:
1. I got another job! I applied at T.J. Maxx about three weeks ago, interviewed last week, and got the job this week. I start in the fitting room on Monday. One of my roommates works there so it'll be way fun and convenient. The girl I did orientation with today lives by me so now I know two fellow employees (other than management and all) before I've even started. Wheeeeeeeeeeeee
2. Weekends here are amazing. Friday night is always a party, somewhere, sometimes combined with a game. Though one two weeks ago ended with us running from the cops, I have a bad ass scrape and no M.I.P. ticket to show for it because I ran so damn fast. And I hid in a window ditch for an hour,. Pure adrenaline there. We also go camping in the canyon every Saturday night, which is always a blast. There's no worrying about cops, it's a beautiful area and the funniest shit goes down.
3. I'm kind of seeing someone. He's awesome and I don't know what we are or where we're going. But it's fun. I'm just going to enjoy it and see what happens. :)
4. Jersey Shore, America's Next Top Model and Glee. 'Nuff said.
5. Classes are going well. I slack off but manage to stay on top of them, which sounds weird. I mean that I can skip journalism often but still ace the test. Pure luck? Maybe. I still work though, and I balance stuff well.
6. My new belly button rings. The one I'm wearing now is a Rasta colored peace sign
7. My awesome friends and family. I'm truly blessed. For reals.
Loving life, all in all! (:
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Heyyy. Ja-Ja-Jaded...
Aerosmith. That's what's up.
I quote them because I'm jaded. Ja-ja-jaded.
Basically, whenever my friends talk about getting married or having children, I want to scream. I hate hearing intelligent girls talk about these traditions like their lives won't be complete without them. One of my friends told me recently that if she had to choose she'd rather get married than finish her bachelor's. What century are we in?
I know that I'm twenty years old and in a few years these topics won't seem as alien as they do to me now. Yet I don't see myself settling down with anyone, ever. I've had major trust issues since my first boyfriend and I broke up about eight months ago. I believed in love when I was with him. Although I don't like to admit it, I honestly thought we'd be together forever
.
Before that nightmare, my parents significantly shaped my view of marriage. Their divorce and quick remarriages were turbulent, to say the least. I know I'm fortunate in lots of ways but growing up with my mom and stepdad made me never want to be in their situation. Their children are the only thing holding their relationship together. It's hanging by a thread that I know will snap again sooner or later.
Maybe I should stop being so bitter about others' dreams because of my life experiences. What do you think?
I quote them because I'm jaded. Ja-ja-jaded.
Basically, whenever my friends talk about getting married or having children, I want to scream. I hate hearing intelligent girls talk about these traditions like their lives won't be complete without them. One of my friends told me recently that if she had to choose she'd rather get married than finish her bachelor's. What century are we in?
I know that I'm twenty years old and in a few years these topics won't seem as alien as they do to me now. Yet I don't see myself settling down with anyone, ever. I've had major trust issues since my first boyfriend and I broke up about eight months ago. I believed in love when I was with him. Although I don't like to admit it, I honestly thought we'd be together forever
.
Before that nightmare, my parents significantly shaped my view of marriage. Their divorce and quick remarriages were turbulent, to say the least. I know I'm fortunate in lots of ways but growing up with my mom and stepdad made me never want to be in their situation. Their children are the only thing holding their relationship together. It's hanging by a thread that I know will snap again sooner or later.
Maybe I should stop being so bitter about others' dreams because of my life experiences. What do you think?
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Wake Me Up When September Ends
I logged on to Facebook this morning and scrolled through the live feed, reading stati like a creeper. Only two of my friends (at that time) had posts about 9/11. I wasn't exactly surprised. We live across the country from where it happened and most of my Facebook friends are college and high school students. A girl in my modern rhetorical theory class actually asked me what NPR is last week. I sat there in shock for a bit before I finally sputtered out an explanation of National Public Radio and all its awesomeness.
I know I'm not the best example of a socially conscious, upstanding citizen. Though I do love NPR, my thoughts and actions are predominantly selfish. When will I go to Wal-Mart today? What time does Jersey Shore come on? I'm ridiculous. And I know I'm not alone.
So today, nine years after a nightmare that in some ways we're still in, I just hope everyone thinks about it. Innocent people who showed up for work on a September morning died. When I think about that, all my problems are miniscule.
9/11/01
We will never forget
I know I'm not the best example of a socially conscious, upstanding citizen. Though I do love NPR, my thoughts and actions are predominantly selfish. When will I go to Wal-Mart today? What time does Jersey Shore come on? I'm ridiculous. And I know I'm not alone.
So today, nine years after a nightmare that in some ways we're still in, I just hope everyone thinks about it. Innocent people who showed up for work on a September morning died. When I think about that, all my problems are miniscule.
9/11/01
We will never forget
Monday, August 30, 2010
Weekends in Logan (:
Today was my first day of school for the semester. Needless to say, the weekend was crazy! We all had to live it up before school started again. And we'll continue to do so, just with added stress. I'll recap the weekend's events (what I can remember of them ;)
FRIDAY
Friday started out innocently enough. It was my roommate Sam's birthday, so we went out for pizza. Later my friend Kayla and I went to check out a dance in the basement of the freshman dorms. We walked in and saw a huge group of white Mormon kids dancing to Soulja Boy and a table of jello. We immediately left.
Shortly after, our buddy Kan called and invited us to his friend's party. Kan, aka The Eternally Drunk Japanese Kid, assured us that it was totally chill and there was plenty of Bud Lite to go around. So Kayla, Katie and I got a ride with a guy named Mike we knew from last semester.
Neither of my friends were drinking, so Mike and I teamed up for beer pong against Kan and another Asian. We lost after a very long close game, and Katie and Kayla left early. After king's cup, I was officially smashed.
Backing up: Kan went upstairs during king's cup. Two minutes later my phone started ringing and it was him.
"Lyssa! I can't get out of the bathroom!"
"What? I was just in there. Turn the handle!"
"It's not working!!! Help me!"
So Mike and I ran upstairs and instructed him to turn the handle every way possible. Other people started looking for stuff to pry the door open. One girl wanted to call the cops to get him out, but I reminded her of how stupid that would be considering that Kan and I are only 20.
After about half an hour, Kan FINALLY got the door to open. The whole thing is still kind of a mystery. Anyway, we finished our game and people started to leave. Mike lives in an apartment complex three blocks from the house we were at, so we walked there to watch The Hangover because Kan hadn't seen it yet.
We still had a case of beer with five cans in it. Kan stuck it under his shirt and announced that he was 5 months pregnant. I called being its godmother. Like a boss.
After the movie and the rest of the Bud Lite, Mike invited us to sleep over. I was kinda sketched out because I know he used to like me, so I said we were fine to walk home. Kan's house was a 2 mile walk from Mike's, but we were armed with cigarettes and my rape whistle. I ended up staying at Kan's and woke up in my ex boyfriend's bed wearing Kan's T shirt and basketball shorts. I'm sooo grateful that he was in Ogden at the time. I did a semi walk of shame back to my place after thanking Kan for taking care of me. I passed some people taking family photos on Old Main Hill and thought about how lucky I am. They had probably just played board games last night. I'd partied with my favorite Asian. Yay-yeah!
SATURDAY
My friend Gabby and I heard about a concert that night in the student center, but we didn't know anything about it. We went to my RA's apartment to inquire and one of his roommates gave us a flier for a frat party. It was a tattoo party, so a group of us girls wore white tank tops so that people could draw on our clothes and skin.
We showed up a bit too early, so it was kind of lame at first. But by 10 tons of people had shown up and it got crazy! I gleefully garnered tons of body graffiti. Someone wrote "Josh's" with an arrow pointing down on my shirt. Katie crossed it out and put her name. I danced with a hottie from the U, but when he asked me if I wanted to go smoke with him I said no. Sketchy things go down at the Sigma Chi house so I went back to my friends to be safe. That was probably a good call.
If you look up sketchy in the dictionary, there is a picture of Kanye the creeper next to it. Kanye was a drunk German guy who approached us just as we were about to leave.
"I NEED TO SIGN SOMEBODY'S BREAST!" he bellowed.
He then went on to explain that in Germany, they were classy and always said breasts, not boobs. There was a lot of other random shit he said that I don't remember. The main point is that my friend Erin wasn't paying attention until he asked her for a marker. She said sure and handed him one.
"GIVE ME YOUR RIGHT BREAST!"-Kanye
Well A) Erin was the only one of us not wearing a white shirt, B) She was really creeped out, with good reason since she didn't hear the rest of his rant and he was a creeper and C) It was her first week of college. Poor freshman. What a story to tell your grandchildren ;)
We left around 12, right before the cops showed up. Perfect timing in that regard...but then it started POURING! We were already wearing white shirts, and I didn't want the marker on mine to come off. So I said, "Let's just take them off!" I was kind of joking, but then I decided it was a brilliant idea. I took mine off and four of my friends followed suit! We ran back to the dorms in our bras and short shorts like crazy girls. Several people honked at us and guys on the third floor of our building ran out onto the deck, most of them saying stuff like "Dude! No fucking way! Jason, get your ass out here and check this out!"
We dried off, changed and went to Beto's. After that we hit up a random party where Kan was the only really drunk one and tried to smoke incense. The best part was our rainy striptease though!!!! ha
SUNDAY
Well. Yesterday was pretty dull compared to those nights. We did have an awesome campfire though! Check out my facebook photos.
All in all, a sublime ending to summer. Fo real.
FRIDAY
Friday started out innocently enough. It was my roommate Sam's birthday, so we went out for pizza. Later my friend Kayla and I went to check out a dance in the basement of the freshman dorms. We walked in and saw a huge group of white Mormon kids dancing to Soulja Boy and a table of jello. We immediately left.
Shortly after, our buddy Kan called and invited us to his friend's party. Kan, aka The Eternally Drunk Japanese Kid, assured us that it was totally chill and there was plenty of Bud Lite to go around. So Kayla, Katie and I got a ride with a guy named Mike we knew from last semester.
Neither of my friends were drinking, so Mike and I teamed up for beer pong against Kan and another Asian. We lost after a very long close game, and Katie and Kayla left early. After king's cup, I was officially smashed.
Backing up: Kan went upstairs during king's cup. Two minutes later my phone started ringing and it was him.
"Lyssa! I can't get out of the bathroom!"
"What? I was just in there. Turn the handle!"
"It's not working!!! Help me!"
So Mike and I ran upstairs and instructed him to turn the handle every way possible. Other people started looking for stuff to pry the door open. One girl wanted to call the cops to get him out, but I reminded her of how stupid that would be considering that Kan and I are only 20.
After about half an hour, Kan FINALLY got the door to open. The whole thing is still kind of a mystery. Anyway, we finished our game and people started to leave. Mike lives in an apartment complex three blocks from the house we were at, so we walked there to watch The Hangover because Kan hadn't seen it yet.
We still had a case of beer with five cans in it. Kan stuck it under his shirt and announced that he was 5 months pregnant. I called being its godmother. Like a boss.
After the movie and the rest of the Bud Lite, Mike invited us to sleep over. I was kinda sketched out because I know he used to like me, so I said we were fine to walk home. Kan's house was a 2 mile walk from Mike's, but we were armed with cigarettes and my rape whistle. I ended up staying at Kan's and woke up in my ex boyfriend's bed wearing Kan's T shirt and basketball shorts. I'm sooo grateful that he was in Ogden at the time. I did a semi walk of shame back to my place after thanking Kan for taking care of me. I passed some people taking family photos on Old Main Hill and thought about how lucky I am. They had probably just played board games last night. I'd partied with my favorite Asian. Yay-yeah!
SATURDAY
My friend Gabby and I heard about a concert that night in the student center, but we didn't know anything about it. We went to my RA's apartment to inquire and one of his roommates gave us a flier for a frat party. It was a tattoo party, so a group of us girls wore white tank tops so that people could draw on our clothes and skin.
We showed up a bit too early, so it was kind of lame at first. But by 10 tons of people had shown up and it got crazy! I gleefully garnered tons of body graffiti. Someone wrote "Josh's" with an arrow pointing down on my shirt. Katie crossed it out and put her name. I danced with a hottie from the U, but when he asked me if I wanted to go smoke with him I said no. Sketchy things go down at the Sigma Chi house so I went back to my friends to be safe. That was probably a good call.
If you look up sketchy in the dictionary, there is a picture of Kanye the creeper next to it. Kanye was a drunk German guy who approached us just as we were about to leave.
"I NEED TO SIGN SOMEBODY'S BREAST!" he bellowed.
He then went on to explain that in Germany, they were classy and always said breasts, not boobs. There was a lot of other random shit he said that I don't remember. The main point is that my friend Erin wasn't paying attention until he asked her for a marker. She said sure and handed him one.
"GIVE ME YOUR RIGHT BREAST!"-Kanye
Well A) Erin was the only one of us not wearing a white shirt, B) She was really creeped out, with good reason since she didn't hear the rest of his rant and he was a creeper and C) It was her first week of college. Poor freshman. What a story to tell your grandchildren ;)
We left around 12, right before the cops showed up. Perfect timing in that regard...but then it started POURING! We were already wearing white shirts, and I didn't want the marker on mine to come off. So I said, "Let's just take them off!" I was kind of joking, but then I decided it was a brilliant idea. I took mine off and four of my friends followed suit! We ran back to the dorms in our bras and short shorts like crazy girls. Several people honked at us and guys on the third floor of our building ran out onto the deck, most of them saying stuff like "Dude! No fucking way! Jason, get your ass out here and check this out!"
We dried off, changed and went to Beto's. After that we hit up a random party where Kan was the only really drunk one and tried to smoke incense. The best part was our rainy striptease though!!!! ha
SUNDAY
Well. Yesterday was pretty dull compared to those nights. We did have an awesome campfire though! Check out my facebook photos.
All in all, a sublime ending to summer. Fo real.
Monday, August 23, 2010
Mormons...
Obviously, the school I go to is heavily Mormon. Whether or not you're LDS here you know what RM, FHE, FYE and CTR stand for. 90% of them are here because they didn't get in to BYU. Everyone gets married before they can legally drink. They don't wear tank tops or swear.
If I could say something to all the Mormons at my school without them trying to convert me, it would be this:
LIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You are in COLLEGE, goddammit! This is the time in your life when you should be making stupid decisions, not picking out china patterns. Get drunk! Have casual sex! Pull all nighters on a regular basis! Smoke a bowl!
This message is brought to you by boredom and frustration...so there you have it (:
If I could say something to all the Mormons at my school without them trying to convert me, it would be this:
LIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You are in COLLEGE, goddammit! This is the time in your life when you should be making stupid decisions, not picking out china patterns. Get drunk! Have casual sex! Pull all nighters on a regular basis! Smoke a bowl!
This message is brought to you by boredom and frustration...so there you have it (:
Sunday, August 22, 2010
A Post Just for You, Mackenzie (:
Although I am really, really tired, I can't fall asleep. Probably because I had Dr. Pepper tonight after two months of not drinking it. I was doing so well! Alas, DP and smoking are hard habits to break.
Anyway, I received an awesome phone call tonight from Mackenzie and Danielle. Well, mostly Mackenzie. (: She asked me to keep posting in my blog, because she wants to know about my life. So this post is for you! I hope you enjoy it. And that it's semi-coherent in spite of my zombie-like state.
So this year I have four roommates. They are:
SAM: She lived on my floor last year and we had Literary Analysis 2600 together. Sam's really neat and organized. Therefore, it's a good thing we're not sharing a room. She's like the mother hen because she looks out for everybody.
CHRISTINA: Is one of Sam's oldest friends. She lived off-campus last year but for a long time I thought she lived on our floor because she was always around. Christina is a) good with tools and b) good with computers. I am so, so, soooooo grateful to have her in the apartment, because I'm terrible with both of those things.
KATHLEEN: She hasn't moved in yet and we're not 100% sure she'll be able to live with us. She's supposed to be Christina's roommate. Her dad is a douche and jeopardizing her return to USU. So I hope it works out. Kat's super sweet and really funny. She also lived on the 3rd floor last year.
KATIE: Is my roomie!!! (: I've known Katie since 6th grade. Well, actually 5th grade because we met at a birthday party. She transferred to USU this year and I am so stoked!!!!! We're going to party hardy. And maybe occasionally study together. ha
I feel incredibly lucky. I get to live with my awesome friends and attend a school with a kick ass tech writing program and good parties (though not as good as Eugene's, I know ;)
Plus my parents have been so great this week. Brian stayed up until 4am last night fixing my computer, Flying Spaghetti Monster bless him. My mom helped me cart my stuff in today and bought me a bunch of things I forgot.
I'll end this post with a list:
THINGS I MISS ABOUT HOME WHEN I DON'T LIVE THERE (THOUGH I AM SO GLAD I DON'T LIVE THERE FULL TIME)
-My mom's pasole
-My puppies!
-All of my friends but especially Abby, who lives 2 miles away so I see her like everyday
-West Haven park, the awesome place down the street where I walk my dogs and go running
So stoked for this year!!!!
Peace
Anyway, I received an awesome phone call tonight from Mackenzie and Danielle. Well, mostly Mackenzie. (: She asked me to keep posting in my blog, because she wants to know about my life. So this post is for you! I hope you enjoy it. And that it's semi-coherent in spite of my zombie-like state.
So this year I have four roommates. They are:
SAM: She lived on my floor last year and we had Literary Analysis 2600 together. Sam's really neat and organized. Therefore, it's a good thing we're not sharing a room. She's like the mother hen because she looks out for everybody.
CHRISTINA: Is one of Sam's oldest friends. She lived off-campus last year but for a long time I thought she lived on our floor because she was always around. Christina is a) good with tools and b) good with computers. I am so, so, soooooo grateful to have her in the apartment, because I'm terrible with both of those things.
KATHLEEN: She hasn't moved in yet and we're not 100% sure she'll be able to live with us. She's supposed to be Christina's roommate. Her dad is a douche and jeopardizing her return to USU. So I hope it works out. Kat's super sweet and really funny. She also lived on the 3rd floor last year.
KATIE: Is my roomie!!! (: I've known Katie since 6th grade. Well, actually 5th grade because we met at a birthday party. She transferred to USU this year and I am so stoked!!!!! We're going to party hardy. And maybe occasionally study together. ha
I feel incredibly lucky. I get to live with my awesome friends and attend a school with a kick ass tech writing program and good parties (though not as good as Eugene's, I know ;)
Plus my parents have been so great this week. Brian stayed up until 4am last night fixing my computer, Flying Spaghetti Monster bless him. My mom helped me cart my stuff in today and bought me a bunch of things I forgot.
I'll end this post with a list:
THINGS I MISS ABOUT HOME WHEN I DON'T LIVE THERE (THOUGH I AM SO GLAD I DON'T LIVE THERE FULL TIME)
-My mom's pasole
-My puppies!
-All of my friends but especially Abby, who lives 2 miles away so I see her like everyday
-West Haven park, the awesome place down the street where I walk my dogs and go running
So stoked for this year!!!!
Peace
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Relationships On and Off Screen
Tonight I watched this awesome movie for the second time. I first saw it in theaters with my then-boyfriend; this time I watched it with three good friends at one of their houses. I thoroughly love (500) Days of Summer. I have a short attention span and enjoy most movies in a shallow sense. Once in a while, though, one comes along that really resonates with me. I'll think about it often after seeing it and immediately want to watch it again.
After watching Summer again, I thought more about relationships. I've had two boyfriends:
Boyfriend #1
E was my high school boyfriend. I hated it when people called us "high school sweethearts". The term sickened me because it made me think of people who marry their high school sweetheart. I was (and am) terrified of marriage because of my parents' divorce, not unlike Summer in the movie.
I was still in love though. We started going out near the end of sophomore year and clicked instantly. Our relationship was committed but not really serious until the summer before senior year. We'd been separated for almost 2 months and had a Kodak reunion complete with me squealing when he showed up at my door and jumping on him.
A couple weeks later, we were talking in his car at the park down the street from my house. The conversation was breezy, but I had an abrupt realization. Senior year had just begun and I didn't know how much time we had left.
"What's going to happen to us?", I asked.
"I don't know...I just want to be with you."
I thought about college differently after that. I had no idea where to go and didn't have my heart set on a dream school. So I did the most idiotic thing possible. I chose Utah State because that was where E wanted to go. I told myself I'd be happy anywhere as long as we were together.
I wish I'd known how much I was limiting myself. We all have to learn from mistakes though. And after two dramatic break-ups during our freshman year of college, I learned the hard way.
Boyfriend #2
J couldn't be more different from my first boyfriend. I met him at a party about two months after the final E breakup. He was funny and cute. I was drunk and on the rebound. We exchanged numbers and started hanging out often with our many mutual friends. He offered me a ride home for spring break since we were from the same city. And things sort of took off from there. We hung out almost every day of that break and were inseparable when we got back to school. He broke up with me after about 2 months, when the school year was winding down and we knew we were going to be in different cities for the summer. This time though, there was no drama and we parted as close friends.
I think of my first relationship as one of those drawn out off and on couples from TV. Carrie and Big, Ross and Rachel, Cory and Topanga...except our story doesn't have a happy ending. In comparison, my second relationship was a standard-issue chick flick: sweet, short and unbelievably simple.
I still have a lot to learn. I've experienced two extremes: a two month fantasy and a nearly three year ordeal that was both good and bad. I've screwed up a lot, but I honestly have no regrets. Everything I've done has made me who I am now. And someone is waiting right around the corner...like Autumn was for Tom.
After watching Summer again, I thought more about relationships. I've had two boyfriends:
Boyfriend #1
E was my high school boyfriend. I hated it when people called us "high school sweethearts". The term sickened me because it made me think of people who marry their high school sweetheart. I was (and am) terrified of marriage because of my parents' divorce, not unlike Summer in the movie.
I was still in love though. We started going out near the end of sophomore year and clicked instantly. Our relationship was committed but not really serious until the summer before senior year. We'd been separated for almost 2 months and had a Kodak reunion complete with me squealing when he showed up at my door and jumping on him.
A couple weeks later, we were talking in his car at the park down the street from my house. The conversation was breezy, but I had an abrupt realization. Senior year had just begun and I didn't know how much time we had left.
"What's going to happen to us?", I asked.
"I don't know...I just want to be with you."
I thought about college differently after that. I had no idea where to go and didn't have my heart set on a dream school. So I did the most idiotic thing possible. I chose Utah State because that was where E wanted to go. I told myself I'd be happy anywhere as long as we were together.
I wish I'd known how much I was limiting myself. We all have to learn from mistakes though. And after two dramatic break-ups during our freshman year of college, I learned the hard way.
Boyfriend #2
J couldn't be more different from my first boyfriend. I met him at a party about two months after the final E breakup. He was funny and cute. I was drunk and on the rebound. We exchanged numbers and started hanging out often with our many mutual friends. He offered me a ride home for spring break since we were from the same city. And things sort of took off from there. We hung out almost every day of that break and were inseparable when we got back to school. He broke up with me after about 2 months, when the school year was winding down and we knew we were going to be in different cities for the summer. This time though, there was no drama and we parted as close friends.
I think of my first relationship as one of those drawn out off and on couples from TV. Carrie and Big, Ross and Rachel, Cory and Topanga...except our story doesn't have a happy ending. In comparison, my second relationship was a standard-issue chick flick: sweet, short and unbelievably simple.
I still have a lot to learn. I've experienced two extremes: a two month fantasy and a nearly three year ordeal that was both good and bad. I've screwed up a lot, but I honestly have no regrets. Everything I've done has made me who I am now. And someone is waiting right around the corner...like Autumn was for Tom.
Sunday, August 15, 2010
"Did you install blahdiddyblahblahblah?" "Um, I don't know what that is"
My laptop is currently being funky and might have a virus. So for now I'm using one of my family's PCs until my stepdad Brian fixes it. He asked me several questions while messing with it yesterday, most of them along the lines of "Why didn't you install anti-virus software?"
Honestly, I just hadn't thought about it! I am so clueless when it comes to technology. When I got my laptop near the end of senior year, I thought the guys at Best Buy had set me up completely. I gleefully added iTunes, photo software and a few other personal touches and was satisfied.
Now my computer's configuration is messed up, so I'll likely have to take it into Best Buy tomorrow. Brian has done what he can with it and I have to give him massive props for not yelling at me in the process. He is a 50-year-old engineer and I'm a 20-year-old English major. We have nothing in common other than our sign (Leo). After years of constantly butting heads, we've fallen into a casual pattern of ignorance. We acknowledge each other when necessary but other than that don't really communicate.
EPIPHANY!!!
My relationship with Brian and my relationship with technology are the same! I realize they're both necessary (technology for school and to communicate with the outside world, Brian because he's married to my mom and has 2 kids with her). I don't particularly enjoy either though and sometimes I wish they didn't exist.
At the end of the day though, I'm thankful for both. Online shopping and a place to live when I'm not in Logan make them worth the hassle.
Honestly, I just hadn't thought about it! I am so clueless when it comes to technology. When I got my laptop near the end of senior year, I thought the guys at Best Buy had set me up completely. I gleefully added iTunes, photo software and a few other personal touches and was satisfied.
Now my computer's configuration is messed up, so I'll likely have to take it into Best Buy tomorrow. Brian has done what he can with it and I have to give him massive props for not yelling at me in the process. He is a 50-year-old engineer and I'm a 20-year-old English major. We have nothing in common other than our sign (Leo). After years of constantly butting heads, we've fallen into a casual pattern of ignorance. We acknowledge each other when necessary but other than that don't really communicate.
EPIPHANY!!!
My relationship with Brian and my relationship with technology are the same! I realize they're both necessary (technology for school and to communicate with the outside world, Brian because he's married to my mom and has 2 kids with her). I don't particularly enjoy either though and sometimes I wish they didn't exist.
At the end of the day though, I'm thankful for both. Online shopping and a place to live when I'm not in Logan make them worth the hassle.
Friday, August 13, 2010
Blame It on The A-a-a-a-a-alcohol
Disclaimer: there is some harsh language in this post. But it's only to tell the story.
A free concert in Salt Lake City attracts all kinds of people. Mostly drunk ones. Tonight was no exception. My friends and I were sober, but we were surrounded by them. I have no problem with this for the most part. I drink whenever I have the opportunity so I don't judge. Everyone can make their own decisions.
BUT...sometimes they do stupid shit. Not just the stupid shit I am prone to do, like make out with a stranger or spill food. Really cruel stuff. And I know this post is full of fragments and the English major in me is upset, but I think it's the best way to describe what went down.
A former classmate approached us, three sheets to the wind. He extended his arms and boomed, "WHAT'S UP NIGGAS?!"
Okaaaay. That I could overlook. But it was when he yelled at my friend (who's black) "I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU NIGGA! I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU!"
I wanted to haul off and hit him, but a) I was paralyzed in shock and b) it wouldn't have helped the situation. I know know we all do things out of character while drunk, but this wasn't just drunken banter. He and my friend weren't exactly on good terms the last time they talked, so there was genuine hate in his words.
I hope he has a wicked hangover in the morning so he'll feel some remorse. I doubt he'll remember what he said. My friend and I remember, but she's strong enough not to let it bother her and will likely even laugh about it.
Erase the hate.
And think before you drink.
Hahaha I just sounded like an ad for Above The Influence or something. Anyway, you know what I mean :P
A free concert in Salt Lake City attracts all kinds of people. Mostly drunk ones. Tonight was no exception. My friends and I were sober, but we were surrounded by them. I have no problem with this for the most part. I drink whenever I have the opportunity so I don't judge. Everyone can make their own decisions.
BUT...sometimes they do stupid shit. Not just the stupid shit I am prone to do, like make out with a stranger or spill food. Really cruel stuff. And I know this post is full of fragments and the English major in me is upset, but I think it's the best way to describe what went down.
A former classmate approached us, three sheets to the wind. He extended his arms and boomed, "WHAT'S UP NIGGAS?!"
Okaaaay. That I could overlook. But it was when he yelled at my friend (who's black) "I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU NIGGA! I DON'T GIVE A FUCK ABOUT YOU!"
I wanted to haul off and hit him, but a) I was paralyzed in shock and b) it wouldn't have helped the situation. I know know we all do things out of character while drunk, but this wasn't just drunken banter. He and my friend weren't exactly on good terms the last time they talked, so there was genuine hate in his words.
I hope he has a wicked hangover in the morning so he'll feel some remorse. I doubt he'll remember what he said. My friend and I remember, but she's strong enough not to let it bother her and will likely even laugh about it.
Erase the hate.
And think before you drink.
Hahaha I just sounded like an ad for Above The Influence or something. Anyway, you know what I mean :P
Thursday, August 12, 2010
First Post
Hello!
I've started this blog for the same reason I imagine most people start blogging: boredom. I know mine will never be as good as any of the ones I follow, but I might as well try it! (:
While I'm waiting for my clothes to dry, let me tell you a bit about myself.
1. I am a sophomore in college. My major is English with a Professional and Technical Writing emphasis. This means that I want to be an editor at a major book publishing company in New York City. Most people laugh at my dream. I'm going to make it happen, then do the "I told you so" dance from Scrubs.
2. My blog's title is that of an old No Doubt song. Favorite. Band. Ever.
3. My URL is dedicated to two adorable springer spaniel dogs, Sam and Freckles (it used to be Frodo until my stepdad made me change it). I couldn't love a human baby more than I love those dogs.
4. My clothes are done. Yay!
Peace
Lyssa
I've started this blog for the same reason I imagine most people start blogging: boredom. I know mine will never be as good as any of the ones I follow, but I might as well try it! (:
While I'm waiting for my clothes to dry, let me tell you a bit about myself.
1. I am a sophomore in college. My major is English with a Professional and Technical Writing emphasis. This means that I want to be an editor at a major book publishing company in New York City. Most people laugh at my dream. I'm going to make it happen, then do the "I told you so" dance from Scrubs.
2. My blog's title is that of an old No Doubt song. Favorite. Band. Ever.
3. My URL is dedicated to two adorable springer spaniel dogs, Sam and Freckles (it used to be Frodo until my stepdad made me change it). I couldn't love a human baby more than I love those dogs.
4. My clothes are done. Yay!
Peace
Lyssa
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